When it's your time,
you get your rhyme.
"I love finding out about celebrity deaths through the medium of sub-standard verse."
"It's a shame they never get to read them themselves."
"When's Jeremy Clarkson going to die?"
Verne Troyer
Verne Troyer
The mini me dwarf
Drank loads of booze
And it carried him orf*
*or something else did (Kate)
The mini me dwarf
Drank loads of booze
And it carried him orf*
*or something else did (Kate)
Avicii
Wake me up when it's all over
Is what Avicii said
But we can't
Because he's dead (Kate)
Is what Avicii said
But we can't
Because he's dead (Kate)
Avicii
Arrivederci. (Mike)
Arrivederci. (Mike)
Dale Winton
Dale Winton
Was a Supermarket Sweeper
Now he's gone off with
The grim reaper. (Kate)
Was a Supermarket Sweeper
Now he's gone off with
The grim reaper. (Kate)
Eric Bristow
Eric Bristow
Made gravy from bisto
But now he has died
The carvery's dried. (Kate)
Made gravy from bisto
But now he has died
The carvery's dried. (Kate)
Winnie Mandela
Winnie Mandela
Had Nelson as a fella
She fought apartheid
But has died. (Mike)
Had Nelson as a fella
She fought apartheid
But has died. (Mike)
Cremation or burial
Whaddya think the selection is?
Traditional old school
Or matches and necklaces? (Noami)
Whaddya think the selection is?
Traditional old school
Or matches and necklaces? (Noami)
Bill Maynard
Another death,
We'll have to blog it.
Oh no! This time it's
Selwyn Froggitt! (Mike)
We'll have to blog it.
Oh no! This time it's
Selwyn Froggitt! (Mike)
Sudan
Sudan's death
Is sad and preposterous,
The last male northern
White Rhinoceros. (Mike)
Is sad and preposterous,
The last male northern
White Rhinoceros. (Mike)
What a bunch of tossers, us.
To end the white rhinoceros (Karl)
To end the white rhinoceros (Karl)
You know,
And I know
That we must conserve
The Rhino. (Mike)
And I know
That we must conserve
The Rhino. (Mike)
Alas the white rhinoceros
Has gone the way of Toys R Us (Kate)
Has gone the way of Toys R Us (Kate)
No man
Of woman born
Should slaughter those
That have the horn. (Mike)
Of woman born
Should slaughter those
That have the horn. (Mike)
A white rhino, not a right wino (Karl)
Toys R Us
You'll buy no more stuff
From Toys R Us
Because they've just
Gone bust. (Mike)
From Toys R Us
Because they've just
Gone bust. (Mike)
Stephen Hawking
Professor Stephen Hawking
Wasn't good at walking
But he caused a great sensation
With his own kind of radiation. (Mike)
Wasn't good at walking
But he caused a great sensation
With his own kind of radiation. (Mike)
Hubert de Givenchy
Hubert de Givenchy
Made stuff that was raunchy
But now he's followed the fashion
Of celebrities to pass on. (Mike)
Made stuff that was raunchy
But now he's followed the fashion
Of celebrities to pass on. (Mike)
Ken Dodd
Did Dodd Die?
Diddy?
Dodd's dead. (Joel)
Diddy?
Dodd's dead. (Joel)
Ken Dodd
Is with God
The man of Diddy
Was a right old biddy (Kate)
Is with God
The man of Diddy
Was a right old biddy (Kate)
Roger Bannister
Roger Bannister
Ran a mile in four minutes.
They'll prepare his coffin
And put him in it. (Mike)
Ran a mile in four minutes.
They'll prepare his coffin
And put him in it. (Mike)
Buttington Oak
After a thousand years
The Buttington Oak
Of Offa's Dyke
Did finally croak. (Mike)
The Buttington Oak
Of Offa's Dyke
Did finally croak. (Mike)
Ingvar Kamprad
Ingvar Kamprad
Made Algots and Veberöds
And Muligs and Vittsjös
But now he's död. (Mike)
Made Algots and Veberöds
And Muligs and Vittsjös
But now he's död. (Mike)
Mark E Smith
Mark E Smith
Sang in The Fall
Now he's not in any band
At all
(Because he's dead) (Kate)
Sang in The Fall
Now he's not in any band
At all
(Because he's dead) (Kate)
Delores O'Riordan
Delores O'Riordan
Was a Cranberry.
Now it's time
Her to bury. (Mike)
Was a Cranberry.
Now it's time
Her to bury. (Mike)
She was a fine
Irish singer,
But she didn't
Choose to linger. (Kate)
Irish singer,
But she didn't
Choose to linger. (Kate)
Delores
No more is. (Mike)
No more is. (Mike)
She may not be gone, she
Might return as a zombie. (Kate)
Might return as a zombie. (Kate)
Mike, do you have to?
Do you have to?
She's a zombie, zombie
Zom be- a be- be a (Joel)
Do you have to?
She's a zombie, zombie
Zom be- a be- be a (Joel)
Fast Eddie
I saw Fast Eddie
On the Iron Fist tour
But now I won't
Any more. (Mike)
On the Iron Fist tour
But now I won't
Any more. (Mike)
I also saw him
When he was in Fastway.
But I won't anymore
'Cos he's passed away. (Mike)
When he was in Fastway.
But I won't anymore
'Cos he's passed away. (Mike)
Fast Eddie
He's Deady. (Kate)
He's Deady. (Kate)
Misha The Aardvark
RIP Misha the aardvark
Who died in a fire in a big park
Actually it was a zoo
But zoo doesn't rhyme so park will do (Kate)
Who died in a fire in a big park
Actually it was a zoo
But zoo doesn't rhyme so park will do (Kate)
Heinz Wolff
I once saw Heinz Wolff
Do a lecture on space,
But now he has run
His last Great Egg Race. (Mike)
Do a lecture on space,
But now he has run
His last Great Egg Race. (Mike)
Keith Chegwin
Ch ch-ch chh chh
Cheggers played pop.
But today
It's time for him to drop. (Mike)
Cheggers played pop.
But today
It's time for him to drop. (Mike)
Max Clifford
Max Clifford
Liked publicity
But then he didn't
And has died in iniquity. (Mike)
Liked publicity
But then he didn't
And has died in iniquity. (Mike)
Max Clifford
Was rapey and gropey
And now he's deceased
After feeling quite ropey (Kate)
Was rapey and gropey
And now he's deceased
After feeling quite ropey (Kate)
Malcolm Young
Malcolm Young
Played rhythm guitar
But he'll not strum
Another bar. (Mike)
Played rhythm guitar
But he'll not strum
Another bar. (Mike)
The guitarist out of
AC/DC
Isnt live-y
Hes more deceased-y (Kate)
AC/DC
Isnt live-y
Hes more deceased-y (Kate)
Tom Petty
Tom Petty
Was fond of spaghetti
But he's curled up his feet y'all
So he's had his last meatball
(Apologies) (Kate)
Was fond of spaghetti
But he's curled up his feet y'all
So he's had his last meatball
(Apologies) (Kate)
Oh no!
Bad news to which I'm awoken.
I truly am
Heartbroken. (Mike)
Bad news to which I'm awoken.
I truly am
Heartbroken. (Mike)
Liz Dawn
If you don't give a fuckoth
About Vera Duckworth
You'll be uninterested to learn
That she's now in an urn (Kate)
About Vera Duckworth
You'll be uninterested to learn
That she's now in an urn (Kate)
Jerry Lewis
Great balls of fire!
Jerry Lewis is dead
Oh no wait, it's not him
It's some other bloke instead. (Kate)
Jerry Lewis is dead
Oh no wait, it's not him
It's some other bloke instead. (Kate)
Glen Campbell
He rode out on a horse
In a star-spangled rodeo,
But now it is time
For Glen Campbell to go. (Mike)
In a star-spangled rodeo,
But now it is time
For Glen Campbell to go. (Mike)
His last album was called Adios
It's almost like he knew!
No more rhinestone cowboy
Or meatballs for your stew (Joel)
It's almost like he knew!
No more rhinestone cowboy
Or meatballs for your stew (Joel)
Campbell is a make of soup
And also was Glen's name
But though he's died of Alzheimer's
The soup remains the same. (Kate)
And also was Glen's name
But though he's died of Alzheimer's
The soup remains the same. (Kate)
The Wichita Lineman,
no longer on the line (Karl)
no longer on the line (Karl)
Barry Norman
Barry Norman
Was not a Mormon
He reviewed films instead
But no more, cos he's dead. (Kate)
Was not a Mormon
He reviewed films instead
But no more, cos he's dead. (Kate)
Brian Cant
Brian Cant
Could
Now he can't. (Kate)
Could
Now he can't. (Kate)
Brian Wood
Brian May
But Brian Cant. (Joel)
Brian May
But Brian Cant. (Joel)
Adam West
Adam West
Is at rest
He failed to stay alive
But he probably did his best. (Kate)
Is at rest
He failed to stay alive
But he probably did his best. (Kate)
Der-der der-der der-der der-der
Der-der der-der der-der der-der
Dead man. (Mike)
Der-der der-der der-der der-der
Dead man. (Mike)
Peter Sallis
He went with his dog for some cheese on the moon
He wore the wrong trousers but caught the crook soon
And then with a sheep he had a close shave
But now Peter Sallis will rest in his grave. (Mike)
He wore the wrong trousers but caught the crook soon
And then with a sheep he had a close shave
But now Peter Sallis will rest in his grave. (Mike)
Gregg Allman
Gregg Allman
Was all man
But the guy who played the theme to Top Gear
Is no longer here. (Mike)
Was all man
But the guy who played the theme to Top Gear
Is no longer here. (Mike)
Chris Cornell
Chris Cornell
Led Audioslave.
Time to put him
In the grave. (Mike)
Led Audioslave.
Time to put him
In the grave. (Mike)
He also was in
Sound Garden
But now his corpse will
Soon harden (Kate)
Sound Garden
But now his corpse will
Soon harden (Kate)
Chris Cornell,
He felt outshined
And now he's left,
This world behind. (Karl)
He felt outshined
And now he's left,
This world behind. (Karl)
David Rockefeller
David Rockefeller
Made a lot of wonga
But now he isn't with us
Any longer. (Mike)
Made a lot of wonga
But now he isn't with us
Any longer. (Mike)
Chuck Berry
He wanted you to play
With his ding-a-ling
But now Chuck Berry
Has become nothing. (Mike)
With his ding-a-ling
But now Chuck Berry
Has become nothing. (Mike)
Peter Mansfield
Sir Peter Mansfield
Won a Nobel prize,
But in the end
Everyone dies. (Mike)
Won a Nobel prize,
But in the end
Everyone dies. (Mike)
Hans Rosling
Hans Rosling's death
Drove me ballistic.
Now he's just
Another statistic. (Mike)
Drove me ballistic.
Now he's just
Another statistic. (Mike)
Tara Palmer-Tomkinson
Tara Palmer-Tomkinson
Was a Socialite by career.
I don't know what that is,
Maybe a bit like Jeremy Corbyn but without the beard. (Mike)
Was a Socialite by career.
I don't know what that is,
Maybe a bit like Jeremy Corbyn but without the beard. (Mike)
Desmond Carrington
Desmond Carrington
Made the music go round.
Time to put him
In the ground. (Mike)
Made the music go round.
Time to put him
In the ground. (Mike)
Peter Sarstedt
Say farewell
To Peter Sarstedt
Who died, not last year,
But this year instead. (Mike)
To Peter Sarstedt
Who died, not last year,
But this year instead. (Mike)
2016
The year of death has stricken dread
In every famous man and woman.
Now, Twenty Sixteen itself is dead.
Wonder who saw that one coming. (Mike)
In every famous man and woman.
Now, Twenty Sixteen itself is dead.
Wonder who saw that one coming. (Mike)
People Who Died
Lemmy growled loud and hammered that bass
But all he ever needed was the Ace of Spades.
Bowie wondered if there was life on Mars
Finished off leaving us one black star.
Ali floated like a butterfly - stung like a bee
Wogan bantered on about children in need.
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
They were all big stars, and they died.
Harper Lee taught us how to kill a mocking bird
While Carla Lane was more into Liver birds.
Manuel knew nothing, and a beating he got.
Paul Daniels was liked but not a lot
Rick Parfitt played for us rock and blues
Shimon Peres was in charge of jews.
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
They were all big stars, and they died.
Henry Heimlich saved people from choking
Caroline Aherne - brilliant at joking
John Glenn was a pioneer of space
Nancy Reagan tried to keep her husband in place.
I never cared for George Michael - not one bit.
All his songs were a pile of shit.
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
They were all big stars, and they died. (Mike)
But all he ever needed was the Ace of Spades.
Bowie wondered if there was life on Mars
Finished off leaving us one black star.
Ali floated like a butterfly - stung like a bee
Wogan bantered on about children in need.
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
They were all big stars, and they died.
Harper Lee taught us how to kill a mocking bird
While Carla Lane was more into Liver birds.
Manuel knew nothing, and a beating he got.
Paul Daniels was liked but not a lot
Rick Parfitt played for us rock and blues
Shimon Peres was in charge of jews.
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
They were all big stars, and they died.
Henry Heimlich saved people from choking
Caroline Aherne - brilliant at joking
John Glenn was a pioneer of space
Nancy Reagan tried to keep her husband in place.
I never cared for George Michael - not one bit.
All his songs were a pile of shit.
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
Those are people who died, died
They were all big stars, and they died. (Mike)
Carrie Fisher
Princess Leia
Isn't here
Oh dear
Shed a tear. (Mike)
Isn't here
Oh dear
Shed a tear. (Mike)
Carrie Fisher!
We'll surely miss her. (Simone)
We'll surely miss her. (Simone)
Princess Leia
Listens to Slayer
In heaven on
A CD player (Kate)
Listens to Slayer
In heaven on
A CD player (Kate)
George Michael
Last Christmas
George Michael was alive
But Twenty Sixteen
He could not survive. (Mike)
George Michael was alive
But Twenty Sixteen
He could not survive. (Mike)
Rick Parfitt
Rick Parfitt
Has gone to the Lord
Never having learned
That fourth chord. (Mike)
Has gone to the Lord
Never having learned
That fourth chord. (Mike)
Ian McCaskill
Ian McCaskill
Predicted the rain.
Now he never will
Again. (Mike)
Predicted the rain.
Now he never will
Again. (Mike)
McCaskill is dead
The rascal (Kate)
The rascal (Kate)
John Glenn
John Glenn
Was a pioneer of space.
But now he's gone to
Another place. (Mike)
Was a pioneer of space.
But now he's gone to
Another place. (Mike)
Greg Lake
Keith Emerson went in March this year
Now Greg Lake is gone, I fear.
I don't want to be a big alarmer
But it don't look good for poor Carl Palmer. (Mike)
Now Greg Lake is gone, I fear.
I don't want to be a big alarmer
But it don't look good for poor Carl Palmer. (Mike)
Andrew Sachs
He beats him here
He beats him there.
That Basil beats him everywhere.
Is he in heaven?
Is he in hell?
That damn fine waiter -
Manuel. (Mike)
He beats him there.
That Basil beats him everywhere.
Is he in heaven?
Is he in hell?
That damn fine waiter -
Manuel. (Mike)
Fidel Castro
Fidel Castro
Ruled Cuba in his own manner.
Now he has smoked
His last Havana. (Mike)
Ruled Cuba in his own manner.
Now he has smoked
His last Havana. (Mike)
Fidel Castro
Went to Tesco
Now he won't-oh
Because he's deado (Kate)
Went to Tesco
Now he won't-oh
Because he's deado (Kate)
Fidel Castro and his cigars,
Those groovy 1950s cars,
A hero to some, but not to most,
We say fairwell, as now he's toast. (Karl)
Those groovy 1950s cars,
A hero to some, but not to most,
We say fairwell, as now he's toast. (Karl)
Good on Fidel Castro
America's principle foe
Will not get to see tomorra
As he's gone the way of Guevara (Julie)
America's principle foe
Will not get to see tomorra
As he's gone the way of Guevara (Julie)
Leonard Cohen
Twenty sixteen
The stars are all going.
Today it has been
Leonard Cohen. (Mike)
The stars are all going.
Today it has been
Leonard Cohen. (Mike)
King Bhumibol Adulyadej
The King and I
Have said goodbye
But no one in Siam
Is as indifferent as I am. (Mike)
Have said goodbye
But no one in Siam
Is as indifferent as I am. (Mike)
Caroline Aherne
Caroline Aherne
Was a good turn,
But now Mrs Merton's
Gone for a Burton. (Mike)
Was a good turn,
But now Mrs Merton's
Gone for a Burton. (Mike)
Anton Yelchin
Anton Yelchin
From Star Trek
Joins the 27 Club,
What the heck? (Mike)
From Star Trek
Joins the 27 Club,
What the heck? (Mike)
How come?
He's dead?
He wore yellow
Not red! (Joel)
He's dead?
He wore yellow
Not red! (Joel)
Anton what?
Who was he?
Oh. Star Trek.
I see. (Kate)
Who was he?
Oh. Star Trek.
I see. (Kate)
Personally, I'm mystified by the continued absence of inertial dampener jokes. (Shim)
That's shit, it doesn't even rhyme. (Kate)
I'm personally mystified
by how this could happen-a:
Still no jokes
about the inertial dampener. (Shim)
by how this could happen-a:
Still no jokes
about the inertial dampener. (Shim)
Much better. (Kate)
Muhammad Ali
Muhammad Ali
He was the greatest
But now he's become
One of the latest. (Mike)
He was the greatest
But now he's become
One of the latest. (Mike)
Muhammad Ali
Used to box
Now he is
In a box (Kate)
Used to box
Now he is
In a box (Kate)
Prince
He thought the rain was purple,
Took his medication per pill,
But never was the smartest,
This artist formerly an artist.
(That's one in the eye for those who think there isn't a rhyme for purple.) (Mike)
Took his medication per pill,
But never was the smartest,
This artist formerly an artist.
(That's one in the eye for those who think there isn't a rhyme for purple.) (Mike)
Gareth Thomas
It's bleak
For Blake.
This bloke
Has broke. (Mike)
For Blake.
This bloke
Has broke. (Mike)
Blake of old Blake's Seven
Is now in spacey heaven.
But Servalan was hotter,
Like some sexy slinky otter.
Er. (Karl)
Is now in spacey heaven.
But Servalan was hotter,
Like some sexy slinky otter.
Er. (Karl)
Blake's Seven
Was shit
Just say no
I thought they were all dead
Ages ago (Kate)
Was shit
Just say no
I thought they were all dead
Ages ago (Kate)
England's Only Golden Eagle
England's only golden eagle
Noble, rare, and truly regal
Has perished - most disagreeable.
Now all we've got's a bunch of seagulls. (Mike)
Noble, rare, and truly regal
Has perished - most disagreeable.
Now all we've got's a bunch of seagulls. (Mike)
Phil Sayer
Phil Sayer
Is in the grave,
But how many lives
Did his wise words save? (Mike)
Is in the grave,
But how many lives
Did his wise words save? (Mike)
Not that many
Silly chap
Most people know
To mind the gap (Kate)
Silly chap
Most people know
To mind the gap (Kate)
Well, they do now,
But that's 'cos of him.
If he hadn't said it
Things could be grim. (Mike)
But that's 'cos of him.
If he hadn't said it
Things could be grim. (Mike)
Don't be daft
We all have brains
We don't need Phil Sayer
To save us from trains. (Kate)
We all have brains
We don't need Phil Sayer
To save us from trains. (Kate)
This is London
Where they're thick as shit
Some fall on the tracks
Where they're hit. (Mike)
Where they're thick as shit
Some fall on the tracks
Where they're hit. (Mike)
In the north
Trains don't hit us
I guess it's survival
Of the fittest (Kate)
Trains don't hit us
I guess it's survival
Of the fittest (Kate)
He tells me I
should mind the gap
But in fact it's all
a pile of crap (Ian)
should mind the gap
But in fact it's all
a pile of crap (Ian)
Don't you start too.
Do not disparage
The man that cared
When we left the carriage. (Mike)
Do not disparage
The man that cared
When we left the carriage. (Mike)
Many a slip
Twixt cup and lip
More again
Twixt foot and train (Ian)
Twixt cup and lip
More again
Twixt foot and train (Ian)
Well done, that man
On your pronouncement.
Let's hear it for public
service announcements. (Mike)
On your pronouncement.
Let's hear it for public
service announcements. (Mike)
Listen to crashing bores
Who scarcely anyone adores
They cry out for their daily chores
"Stand clear of the closing doors!" (Ian)
Who scarcely anyone adores
They cry out for their daily chores
"Stand clear of the closing doors!" (Ian)
Gaps these days are rather small
So as long as you are fat and tall
You probably won't fall through
But if you're small and thin you might do (Kate)
So as long as you are fat and tall
You probably won't fall through
But if you're small and thin you might do (Kate)
Longest Ever Python
These deaths have got crazier
'Cos out in Malaysia
They're all going to miss
This star who went 'hiss'. (Mike)
'Cos out in Malaysia
They're all going to miss
This star who went 'hiss'. (Mike)
Paul Daniels
Paul Daniels
Has gone to his plot.
We all will miss him,
But not a lot. (Mike)
Has gone to his plot.
We all will miss him,
But not a lot. (Mike)
Daniels died by bad brain you see.
What will become of Debbie McGee? (Simone)
What will become of Debbie McGee? (Simone)
Paul Daniels
Had a spaniel
But he fell off his log
Poor lonely dog
God that's terrible. (Kate)
Had a spaniel
But he fell off his log
Poor lonely dog
God that's terrible. (Kate)
Sylvia Anderson
Lady Penelope
Drove in a pink Rolls.
She now goes in another
One of those holes. (Mike)
Drove in a pink Rolls.
She now goes in another
One of those holes. (Mike)
Frank Kelly
Drink!
Girls!
Arse!
Feck!
Some dead celebs simply have the good grace to write their own poems. (Mike)
Girls!
Arse!
Feck!
Some dead celebs simply have the good grace to write their own poems. (Mike)
Alan Rickman
He played Doctor Lazarus
On Protector in Galaxy Quest.
But Alan Rickman won't come back,
Now he's laid to rest. (Mike)
On Protector in Galaxy Quest.
But Alan Rickman won't come back,
Now he's laid to rest. (Mike)
David Bowie
In his time he did earn
A great deal of Fame
But I never did learn
How to pronounce his name. (Mike)
A great deal of Fame
But I never did learn
How to pronounce his name. (Mike)
In the 70s, Bowie
Smoked fags and drank Moët
Drinking & smoking are never the answer
Because they give you cancer (Kate)
Smoked fags and drank Moët
Drinking & smoking are never the answer
Because they give you cancer (Kate)
Oh, what nonsense
Drinking, smoking and taking chemy
Harmed nobody,
Just ask L..., oh. (Mike)
Drinking, smoking and taking chemy
Harmed nobody,
Just ask L..., oh. (Mike)
Jimmy Hill
Jimmy Hill
Gave us a thrill.
He can no longer win,
But he took it on the chin. (Mike)
Gave us a thrill.
He can no longer win,
But he took it on the chin. (Mike)
Warren Mitchell
Warren Mitchell
Appeared coldhearted
But now death
Him has departed. (Mike)
Appeared coldhearted
But now death
Him has departed. (Mike)
Omar Sharif
Omar Sharif's
Life wasn't brief.
He'll play no more bridge
As he's gone in the fridge. (Mike)
Life wasn't brief.
He'll play no more bridge
As he's gone in the fridge. (Mike)
Omar Sharif
Liked curtains of beef
Laurence of Arabia
Must've choked on a labia (Kate)
Liked curtains of beef
Laurence of Arabia
Must've choked on a labia (Kate)
Val Doonican
Val Doonican
Once had a loony fan
Then he died
So she cried. (Kate)
Once had a loony fan
Then he died
So she cried. (Kate)
Val Doonican
Now goes to his hearse.
We wondered how soon he can
Get this verse. (Mike)
Now goes to his hearse.
We wondered how soon he can
Get this verse. (Mike)
Ron Moody
Ron Moody
Was a bit of a foodie
He died eating brie
With Christopher Lee. (Kate)
Was a bit of a foodie
He died eating brie
With Christopher Lee. (Kate)
Errol Brown
Errol Brown
Was truly lyrical.
He's left us now,
So much for miracles. (Mike)
Was truly lyrical.
He's left us now,
So much for miracles. (Mike)
Errol Brown,
Soon in the ground,
No more hell sing,
Hell be a decomposing, rather unsexy thing. (Karl)
Soon in the ground,
No more hell sing,
Hell be a decomposing, rather unsexy thing. (Karl)
Alas Hot Chocolate
now is dead
I'll have to have
Horlicks instead. (Kate)
now is dead
I'll have to have
Horlicks instead. (Kate)
Terry Pratchett
Terry Pratchett
Liked to eat cat shit
So now he'll be buried
Like some kind of hatchet (Kate)
Liked to eat cat shit
So now he'll be buried
Like some kind of hatchet (Kate)
Demis Roussos
Demis Roussos
Said meet me at New Cross
But then he went and died
So I got off at Rotherhithe. (Kate)
Said meet me at New Cross
But then he went and died
So I got off at Rotherhithe. (Kate)
Mourn the loss
Of Demis Roussos
He's gone forever
And ever. (Mike)
Of Demis Roussos
He's gone forever
And ever. (Mike)
Trevor Ward-Davies
First Dave Dee and now it's Dozy
Looks like things are far from Rosy
They're going in order - now that's freaky
You've really got to feel for Beaky. (Mike)
Looks like things are far from Rosy
They're going in order - now that's freaky
You've really got to feel for Beaky. (Mike)
Labidura Herculeana
Labidura herculeana
Truly was a charmer
But when it said 'Here we go'
Did that earwig go. (Mike)
Truly was a charmer
But when it said 'Here we go'
Did that earwig go. (Mike)
Lynsey de Paul
Lynsey de Paul
Was rather small
But has hit Rock Bottom
And soon will be rotten. (Mike)
Was rather small
But has hit Rock Bottom
And soon will be rotten. (Mike)
George Hamilton IV
George Hamilton IV
Has followed George Hamilton III
Who followed George Hamilton II
Who followed George Hamilton (Mike)
Has followed George Hamilton III
Who followed George Hamilton II
Who followed George Hamilton (Mike)
Mickey Rooney
Mickey Rooney
Pulled a fine moony
But now he's deceased
The appeal has decreased. (Kate)
Pulled a fine moony
But now he's deceased
The appeal has decreased. (Kate)
Shirley Temple
Shirley Temple
Choked on a lentil
She didn't really
But nothing rhymes with temple (Kate)
Choked on a lentil
She didn't really
But nothing rhymes with temple (Kate)
J J Cale
Let us wail
For J.J. Cale
They're going to put him in the ground
But don't get him confused with John Cale out of the Velvet Underground. (Mike)
For J.J. Cale
They're going to put him in the ground
But don't get him confused with John Cale out of the Velvet Underground. (Mike)
Reg Presley
Reg Presley wasn't The King
But he sure was a Wild Thing,
And though Love Is All Around,
He's now gone in the ground. (Mike)
But he sure was a Wild Thing,
And though Love Is All Around,
He's now gone in the ground. (Mike)
Michael Winner
To Michael Winner
Say adieu
For his Death Wish
Has come true (Mike)
Say adieu
For his Death Wish
Has come true (Mike)
Michael Winner
Made me some dinner
But he died of a bad liver
So now we're not having liver (Kate)
Made me some dinner
But he died of a bad liver
So now we're not having liver (Kate)
Kenneth Kendall
Kenneth Kendall
Read the news
Now he's in it.
Way to lose. (Mike)
Read the news
Now he's in it.
Way to lose. (Mike)
Kenneth Kendal
Was not from Pendal
He read news and shit
But he wasn't a witch. (Kate)
Was not from Pendal
He read news and shit
But he wasn't a witch. (Kate)
Ravi Shankar
Ravi Shankar
I'd like to thank ya
For all the treats
On Drummond Street. (Mike)
I'd like to thank ya
For all the treats
On Drummond Street. (Mike)
Patrick Moore
Never were his programmes shite,
But now he's in the Great Sky At Night. (Mike)
But now he's in the Great Sky At Night. (Mike)
He hated girls and blacks and gays.
But he wasn't a paedo.
Happy days. (Kate)
But he wasn't a paedo.
Happy days. (Kate)
Who cares if you're a xenophobe
When you can play the xylophone? (Mike)
When you can play the xylophone? (Mike)
Tony Scott
Many big films shown through a projector
Had Tony Scott as their director
He leapt off a bridge. I'll tell you what -
It's not looking good for Selina Scott. (Mike)
Had Tony Scott as their director
He leapt off a bridge. I'll tell you what -
It's not looking good for Selina Scott. (Mike)
Scott McKenzie
Monterey Pop was quite a frenzy
Thanks to those like Scott McKenzie
He brought joy to fans a-plenty.
I hear the funeral's on Wednesday. (Mike)
Thanks to those like Scott McKenzie
He brought joy to fans a-plenty.
I hear the funeral's on Wednesday. (Mike)
Bernard Lovell
He studied cosmic rays
In the younger of his days
But now it's time to shovel
Soil over Bernard Lovell. (Mike)
In the younger of his days
But now it's time to shovel
Soil over Bernard Lovell. (Mike)
Donna Summer
Donna Summer
Oh dear what a bummer
The disco dancer
Dead.
From cancer. (Kate)
Oh dear what a bummer
The disco dancer
Dead.
From cancer. (Kate)
Donna
Is a goner. (Mike)
Is a goner. (Mike)
Bert Weedon
The man who wrote 'Play In A Day'
For Eric Clapton and Brian May
And other greats stars
Of the electric guitar
Has sadly now vanished away. (Mike)
For Eric Clapton and Brian May
And other greats stars
Of the electric guitar
Has sadly now vanished away. (Mike)
Davy Jones
Davy Jones
Wasn't a junky
But now he also
Isn't a Monkee. (Mike)
Wasn't a junky
But now he also
Isn't a Monkee. (Mike)
Davy Jones was fairly short,
and he's gone to meet his receiver,
on the last train to Clarksville,
goes the Day Dream Believer. (Joel)
and he's gone to meet his receiver,
on the last train to Clarksville,
goes the Day Dream Believer. (Joel)
Frank Carson
Frank Carson
Said 'It's a cracker!'
But not any more
Now he's knackered. (Mike)
Said 'It's a cracker!'
But not any more
Now he's knackered. (Mike)
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