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Tales From Beyond The Enchanted Prong Hills

The Star That Lost Its Twinkle


Page 7


"Hang on a minute," said Albert, "What was all that stuff about Muriel? Or were you just talking a load of guano?"
"Oh, that's love," said Pembroke, "That's totally different. Fish can't live without love. That's why we often die for no apparent reason - bit of a bind really. But that's why I desperately need Muriel, because I'm madly in love with her. However, we wouldn't mind each other seeing other fish 'though."
"Or molluscs," said Albert.
"Whatever," said Pembroke, "So you see, when we get caught by a gull it's not all that bad. We're guaranteed two last shags before we finally yield the fillet."
"Well," said Albert, "This is indeed quite a revelation."
It was clear that he would never be able to see his prey in quite the same light again. This was something that really had to be kept from any other fish eating bird.
"Is she still alive?" asked Pembroke.
"Yes," said Albert. The wriggling in his stomach to which he had been accustomed all his life now sickened him, especially when he recalled what his previous meal was: a Peperami sausage he had found on the beach.
"Then it's time for me to join her," said Pembroke.
"Yes, I suppose it is," sighed Albert.
He picked up Pembroke as if he were contaminated with nuclear waste. Reluctantly, he tossed his newly found friend to the back of his beak and with a mighty grimace gulped him straight down. It was the bitterest fish he'd ever had to swallow. Wearily, he strolled up onto the deck as the fishy foreplay commenced inside his body. There he gazed up, stretched his neck and cawed at the stars whose flickering lights caught the opening of his gullet and gently caressed the feathery tails of the fated lovers within. Pembroke had finally delivered his twinkle to Muriel.

In due course, the fatigued bodies began their dissolution into unity, a joining which no man could ever put asunder. Leaving the nuptial chamber they oozed through labyrinthal passages of warm, soft, moistened walls entwined in a glutinous embrace on their honeymoon adventure. Presently, they emerged into a brilliant shining light. The cozy passage walls were gone, replaced with a light, airy breeze, a breeze through which they descended faster, faster. Below them lay a vast expanse of blueness, a strangely familiar body but one which perhaps due to its size and distance took on a forboding air. To one side another great body, one of a cold, grey, rugged texture, lurked menacingly. As Pembroke and Muriel descended towards the inviting mass of blue the craggy protrusions of the grey body lurched dangerously at them. Closer they came, threatening to pluck them from the exhilaration of their lovers' leap. With a feeble splat the piscean coalition struck its antagonist scarring its rocky face with a single pure white streak, a blemish that would serve as a monument to their legacy and which would landmark their love forever.
Or at least until the rain washed it away.

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Mike - April 1995

The Star That Lost Its Twinkle
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