Momp Momp Cark

Volume 2


The cold grey shipping forecast,
That boomed around the shop,
Had heeded to instructions,
When confronted by the mop.

Running through the autumn
The cargo gently swayed
And continued eating cakes
That the Lub-Lub had just laid.

The stairs were bent and loveless
No gander wath the hoot,
A lonely ship befriended
By the hard heel of a boot.

"John O'Groats, be with you!
Now toss me to the shore,"
The Mandarin sang, he knew so well,
As he bounced along the floor.

Beacons they extinguished,
God pulled up a chair,
The smell of ulcers called amidst
The sweetness of her hair.

And so to end the fable,
The night shook stormy red,
And the lion shrugged his shoulders,
And the Lub-Lub shook his head,
And they both went off to bed.

The Zebra And The Flying Bus

The Zebra And The Flying Bus

The multi-fingered zebra
Stood quietly by the road,
Watching pigeons flying by
And squirrels scuttling past.
The night was dark and misty,
And zebras don't have torches.
The moon was its illumination,
The light by which it counted its fingers.

The wind blew hard,
The rain fell down,
The pigeons stopped mid-flap.
The squirrels turned to jellyfish,
And the zebra caught its bus.

The bus was full of emus,
They were cynical and old.
The baby ostrich cackled
The zebra felt uneasy -
The bus was getting faster,

Then in a crash of thunder
The bus flew up and up,
Flattening the stationary pigeons
And startling the squirrels.
The multi-fingered zebra smiled,
And exploded.


A khaki drumstool was my only friend
When needles turned to hamsters
Wailing ancestors shopping for tufts
Among the champagne and canapes.

Dougal frolicking with wistful companions,
The sea is flopping sideways.
Another camel is coming to tea.
Where will he sit?

Flip flops and merriment,
Giraffes gather slarpy spoons.
How much is that window?
You crafty little bugger.

Drollop and frollop and warble with wust
And sheg in the heg if needs warther must.
But croquet at teatime just wasn't the way
And my khaki drumstool slithered away.


Meringue Meringue
My peanuts and my anchovy
Hip hip hooray
In my little house
Oh now my small mouse
Squeek! Hark!
The nibbling chomper
Scarpers. Quick! Catch up!
Oceans of chamber candles
Moistening heartily
Framptious helicopters hover
Over the choppiness (with glee).

Sit down on the flagpole
Oh yes it's my camera
Joy to the world when there came
That bold camel brown hatch

Shug the wain wo
Shug the wain wo

Momp Momp.




Leaves in my coffee
I think my bottle bank
Charlie Alpha Zebra

Larger dusty wardrobe
Drip drip dripping tap
Floundering disasters

Windows are meandering
Pelicans with attitude
Cock the rooster hen

Draw another spider
Kangaroos come cheap
Easter is a lovely word

Bunny hopping saucer
Tea leaves hop the fence
Giraffes buying lobsters'

Creepy crawly ambulance
Partners wire their exhibits
Freshly squeezing lemmings


Haddock; haddock!
Petulant strawberry ant-eater, special bargain, frozen bungle.
With a well-trained eye-hopper, spaniel, Arsenal framp.
Twing. Frippit. Frippit. Pengal. Womp.
Noises on my Rolls Royce sweater - "Gosh! A begonia chair."
Shrimps chime cordless mince piles

Dominant grey squirrels hit the windscreen noiselessly.
Fighting temperately throughout hamsters, nonny nonny.
Smith and Fromble sorting out leave textures at midnight.
Mealing wallabee says "fruity"
Wobbly man
Wobbly man
Wobbly man


Loft Mileage.

August 1994 - February 1995

Momp Momp Cark
Volume  1 2

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